2012’s first weekend was full of impressive feats: Tim Tebow led his Broncos to a white-knuckled, overtime victory against the Steelers; Rep. Gabrielle Giffords said the Pledge of Allegiance in front of thousands of supporters Sunday, one year after being shot in the head; Rick Santorum somehow managed to offend gays and Mormons in the same sentence; and a Papa John’s employee was (extremely) fired after listing an Asian-American customer’s name as “lady chinky eyes” on the receipt. It sounds like an honest mistake…

WANNA GET AWAY, PAPA JOHN’S?: Papa John’s Pizza fired a cashier at one of its New York restaurants and apologized to Minhee Cho, an Asian-American customer, for a receipt that identified her as “lady chinky eyes.” Papa John’s released a statement saying they were “truly sorry for this customer’s experience.” In their defense, the pizza was delicious.

JESUS STILL WITH TEBOW: The Broncos beat the Steelers in overtime Sunday, prolonging the very best year of quarterback Tim Tebow’s life. On the first play from scrimmage in overtime, he completed an 18-yard pass to Demaryius Thomas, who ran for an 80-yard touchdown. Overtime lasted 11 seconds, the shortest in NFL history, which should have been just enough time to understand the new rules.

RICK SANTORUM—STILL PISSING PEOPLE OFF: Campaigning for Tuesday’s New Hampshire primary, Rick Santorum addressed a group of New England College students over the weekend and equated the evils of homosexuality to polygamy. As Maureen Dowd writes, “Even for Santorum, it was a masterpiece of antediluvian abrasiveness—slapping gays and Mormons at the same time.” If the presidential bid doesn’t work out, there’s an opening at Papa John’s. Or this

Also, Rep. Gabrielle Giffords joined thousands in the Pledge of Allegiance on the anniversary of her shooting, and Beyoncé and Jay-Z’s baby was born and christened Blue Ivy Carter.

Have a great week. May all your feats be inoffensive.

—C.B.S.

CONTRIBUTORS

  • C. Brian Smith