Boy do we love streakers.

No, we don’t condone lawlessness, and of course we realize the security risk associated with deranged stalkers coming in contact with professional athletes.

But you have to admit, there’s something glorious about a good-natured fan sneaking onto the field of a nationally televised sporting event, shedding his (or her) clothes and running in circles whilst commentators deem him a “knucklehead” and stadium security attempts, fails and eventually succeeds in tackling him to the ground.

Or, at least, the end of the first half. Arizona was leading 42-7 in a game nobody in America much cared about (both teams are god-awful this season) when something wonderfully bizarre happened:

Our streaker-to-be, impersonating a side-judge referee, blew the play dead and took the field with (almost) flawless precision, official hand signals and all. Our one note: why not pull your pant legs all the way down? Doing so may have avoided raising suspicion long enough to be handed the football, which appears to have been his (pretty awesome) primary goal.

As is protocol, television cameras turned away, denying the streaker what he desired the most—attention. It’s times like this, though, when we’re thankful that every single person in the world has a video camera in their pocket. In the following clip, we ask that you pay specific attention to:

0:07: Streaker’s hesitation-less entrance onto field.
0:12: Streaker’s hesitation-less transition from referee to streaker upon realizing the jig is up.
0:14-0:20: Break-away referee outfit is broken-away in six seconds. (Note: major points deducted for failing to remove underwear.)
0:25: Tackle of a lifetime by Tempe local police officer Frank Dooley.
1:24: Streaker led off the field to the horrified disgust of University of Arizona’s Legion of Traditional Folk Dancers, moments away from their biggest performance of the semester.
1:43: Surprising no one, University of Arizona fans take great pride in the streaker’s performance, chanting “U of A!”

Oh, and we forgot to mention: while the streaker struck, a bench-clearing brawl erupted and three players were ejected from the game. We especially like the commentator’s use of the word “gear” at 0:26.

Wishing you a wonderfully streak-filled weekend…

—C.B.S.

CONTRIBUTORS

  • C. Brian Smith