We’ve got some problems with Valentine’s Day.

You’ve probably already noticed a few of them: the smarmy advertising, the kitsch, the awkward chivalry, the endless parade of overbooked prix fixes, the all-pervading sense of enforced sentiment, without sensitivity or regard for individual circumstance…

Sorry. We got carried away there.

But it’s important, because Valentine’s is letting down romance and it’s letting down the men and women of America. So we’ve come up with a single fix that will restore the day to what it should be, a single cure-all to restore it to the spontaneous, romantic expression February needs so much.

It’s time to change the date.

Don’t tell anyone, just pick your own day and declare your own romantic independence. Take her skydiving. Cook her a lobster. But most of all, surprise her—and do it on your own schedule. It’ll be spontaneous and creative, and most importantly, you won’t have every other couple in the country cramping your style.

Just make it a week or two in advance, early enough to get out from under the weight of expectation that usually drags down the holiday.

Suddenly, you aren’t celebrating a national holiday anymore—you’re celebrating your own holiday, by whatever rules make sense for you and her. It’s a new tradition, just between the two of you.

And when the 14th comes…flowers wouldn’t hurt.

—R.B.

CONTRIBUTORS

  • Russell Brandom