You’ve been seeing a lot of daring, eight-figure heists in the news lately, and it’s led you to one inescapable conclusion: it’s time to become an art thief.
And since you’ve already locked down the tools of the trade—dark suits, grappling hooks, etc.—we’ve scanned through the newswires and assembled a few essential tips for pulling off a suitably sophisticated burglary.
Hard times in London may have brought back the criminal world’s most dapper pastime: the jewel heist. Last week, a pair of well-tailored gentlemen relieved a Bond St shop of more than $65 million in jewelry before escaping in a blue BMW, which was subsequently traded for a silver Mercedes. And that’s only the most recent in a string of thefts that’s plagued London’s jewelry district for months, which suggests the days of the gentleman jewel thief may be returning.
Of course, we at Kempt do not endorse criminal pursuits. But as criminal pursuits go, we definitely prefer the ones that involve luxury cars, daring getaways and expensive suits. If we ever have to resort to extralegal activity, we hope we’ll do it with this much panache.