We’ve long championed the idea of wearing a daily uniform that reflects your personal style, and Old St. Nick has been doing it for centuries (luckily, this is the only time of year you can get away with a red velvet suit).
But the fine folks at Joint London imagined what Papa Noel might wear if he woke up this holiday season in a style rut and decided to try on some Alexander Wang, or Saint Laurent, or Martin Margeila...
It wasn’t easy—it was a long and arduous journey filled with upgrading your kitsch and making a tough decision about wearing a Santa hat. It was all part of our inaugural Kempt Guide to Winning the Holidays (trademark still pending).
It’s Christmas Eve. That means at some point in the next 24 hours you might be faced with the opportunity to don a fur-lined topper, Santa-style...
Now, we included the Santa hat in our holiday must-haves, but with a stern disclaimer: there’s a time and a place for taking such a sartorial risk. If that time’s ever going to come, it’s tonight.
So in the event that you’re feeling up to the challenge, we’ve found some of history’s most stylish gents pulling off the look—from Bing Crosby to Ryan Gosling—and put them here for you, sort of as a sartorial confidence booster. (And as something to keep you occupied for the next couple days, until Kempt returns to our regularly scheduled dapperness.)
In our ongoing campaign to help you win the holidays, we’ve come up with a list of eight integral items you’ll want handy for the upcoming season.
Some are things you can wear, some are calls to action, and some are just a state of mind. But they all add up to one hell of a festive menagerie, bound to get you in the holiday spirit. We’ve got the entire list below, but as always, you can find them anytime you’re in need of inspiration on the left side of the Kempt home page.
We do not endorse wearing a Santa hat to every party you attend over the next two weeks—especially if any of the parties in question are Kwanzaa-themed. There will be cameras, old friends and alcohol. A single costume-y element—like, say, a socklike, red velvet topper—could throw the whole thing out of whack, doing permanent damage to your reputation and your dignity.
You’ve been tapped to play Santa Claus this year, the most beloved bearded man on the planet.
This is not a responsibility to be taken lightly. Properly projecting the triplet of “Ho’s” will require core strength. Properly responding to a kid who’s just asked you to save his house from foreclosure requires a good excuse to take a five-minute break. Parents and children alike are depending on you. (As are the 12 “little people” you hired as elves.)
To help with your preparation, we’ve drawn up a few rules and provided real-life cautionary tales of what happens when those rules aren’t followed.
Turning Drink Against Drink:Modern Drunkard Magazine pits 16 of the world’s most notorious drinkers against each other in March Madness-style brackets. We’re just happy to learn there’s such a thing as Modern Drunkard Magazine. [Modern Drunkard]
A Gentleman’s Guide to Buying Things From Japan: Apparently you can use a proxy to buy all that stuff on Hypebeast. Now you know. [Valet]
Number One: Almost a hundred people name their album of the year. Lotta Janelle Monae fans out there. [The Awl]
He Never Calls, He Never Writes: As an early holiday gift, Google is letting you automate calls from Santa. It’s a little terrifying. [Send Me a Call From Santa]