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The Kempt Guide to Sending Back Food in a Restaurant

  • Jason Wire

Here we are: the height of feasting season.

That means your focus for the next month is fitting in as many dinners as humanly possible. But be forewarned: increased feasting frequency means busier kitchens and a higher chance of culinary errors—namely in the form of undercooked eggs, overcooked steaks and rogue hairs.

In seasons past, you may have let these sorts of things slide. But this year, you’re winning the holidays. And that means exercising your God-given right to eat dinner the way it was intended to be—even when it means sending it back. It’s an essential move, but not without risk: it can irritate your server, create tension among your dining companions and seriously diminish your dining-out cred. Unless you do it correctly.

Herewith, a five-point plan to knowing when and how to give your chef a mulligan.»

Tasya van Ree Is in the Driver’s Seat

  • Kempt Staff

via Driven

Loch-ness Monster: GQ runs down Ryan Lochte’s five finest moments during Fashion Week. [GQ]

Wild Pitch: Here’s your weekly dose of menswear nerdiness: an animated GIF on the proper sleeve pitch of a suit jacket. [Put This On]

A Golden-Brown Infinite Jest: A literary analysis of Guy Fieri’s latest masterpiece of a menu. [NY Mag]

Flashcards: A brief look at six centuries of graphic design from the encyclopedic archive of Phaidon. [Brain Pickings]

Short-Order Slang: A Glossary of Terms

With heavy hearts (and arteries) yesterday we said goodbye to the Prime Burger, one of the last remaining greasy spoons in Manhattan. While our beloved, 74-year-old burger joint couldn’t be saved, its short-order slang must live on.

Diner lingo is by no means exclusive to the Prime Burger—temperamental waitresses and short-order cooks have employed the lippy jargon since the late 1800s. While at times crass (and mildly racist), there’s something undeniably comforting about a gum-smacking gal named Flo commanding some invisible force in the kitchen to “burn one, black and blue, and drag it through the garden.” (Well-done cheeseburger with lettuce, tomato and onion.)

Who knows, these may come in handy the next time you’re short on the bill...»