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The April Issues

  • Kempt Staff

Jason Bateman GQ

Now that it’s spring, everything is abloom—even your local newsstands, thanks to the newest crop of magazines swathed in brightly colored menswear.

In other words: the April issues have arrived.

And in our grand tradition of taking the pulse of printed menswear journalism, we’ve thumbed through all of the highly glossy/flammable pages of the usual suspects to give you the rundown on the upcoming trends, recent cultural phenomena and the requisite amount of eye candy.

Without further ado, the April Issues.»

The Watch That Got Lincoln Laid

At some point between 1839 and 1842, Abraham Lincoln bought a gold pocket watch and inscribed it with the words “To Miss Mary Todd – A Token of my Everlasting Devotion and Affection – Abe Lincoln.” Miraculously, it’s being auctioned off on Saturday at Morphy’s, amongst a spattering of occupational shaving mugs, vintage Chevrolets and British biscuit tins.

The watch itself is 18K gold, but who really gives a shit? Experts are predicting it will sell for between $30,000 and $60,000, which strikes us as a pretty good price for a solid gold love letter written by the guy who freed the slaves.

And since you already made the trip, why not two-birds/one-stone it and snag a couple British biscuit tins for Dad?

The Wrist Pocket Watch

The Very Old Watch has always been a status symbol, whether you got it from great-granddad or your man in Zurich. But if you go back too far, most of the watches come on a chain instead of a wrist strap, which is enough to stop most vintage-diggers in their tracks. Unless, of course, someone’s handy with a soldering iron...

So in the name of progress, the retronauts at Bench & Loom have outfitted a pair of classic pocket watches with some new hardware and alligator straps. By the end, they’re ready for the 21st century—and easily the oldest thing you’ve ever had on your wrist.

The pocket watches in question are a 1938 Hamilton and a 1923 Illinois, both cast from 14k white gold in the intricate style of the day. In short, they look every bit as old as they are. And while they’ll each set you back a solid four figures, that’s not much compared to your Rolex budget.

The Digital Pocket Watch

As you know, we love a good pocket watch. But we draw the line at the digital ones.

The creation before you comes from Flud Watches, a streetwear-minded accessory shop that’s decided to jump into the pocket watch game. The problem is, if you're not wearing a suit, it's going to look like a chain wallet; and if you are wearing a suit, it's just going to look unfortunate.

Still, we have to respect the ambition. Maybe Kanye can pull it off?

The Century-Old Pocket Watch

Patek Phillipe

We’ll be the first to admit, the pocket watch revival we’ve been working on isn’t quite here yet. But it could happen at any moment. And when it does, we’d like to be prepared.

So naturally, when we saw there was a century-old Patek Philippe pocket watch coming up for auction next week, we couldn’t resist. It comes from Antiquorum, one of Hong Kong’s better auction houses, and if the estimate is to be believed, you could walk away with it for a paltry $128,000. Compared to some of the Submariner collections you’ll see on Tumblr, that’s a bargain.

Now all we need is a watch fob, a three-piece suit and (if possible) a monocle.

Kempt Man of the Hour: John Wellington


While there was plenty of good style on display at the Emmys—and plenty of adventurous-but-classy tuxes worthy of a little notice—this week’s MOTH comes from a slightly less formal setting: the Jazz Age Lawn Party at Governor’s Island.

The Bixbyish gentleman here is one John Wellington, demonstrating a linen-soaked look that manages to work in the triple crown of newsboy cap, pocket watch and ascot without coming off as anything other than impeccable. It’s a little costumey, but he’s at a costume ball—and in the meantime he’s showing everyone in sight exactly how rumpled a pair of linen trousers should be, and what life looks like beyond slim-fit.