There were a lot of bizarre spectacles this weekend, but they all fell into three basic categories: Good Weekend: Eli Manning, Chevy, Mitt Romney Bad Weekend: Ferris Bueller, Massholes, Bill Belichick’s sweatshirt Weird Weekend: Tightrope dancer bouncing on testicles in Madonna’s halftime show
It was an explosive weekend throughout the world: the revolution intensified in Syria, Mitt Romney finally jiggled Newt’s feathers in Florida, Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy refuted a Fox reporter’s claim that their latest film pushed “a pro-environment, anti-capitalist agenda,” and Novak Djokovic ever-so-slightly defeated Rafael Nadal in the longest Grand Slam men’s singles final in history.
We’ve been thinking a lot about Newt Gingrich’s hair.
Possibly too much.
It’s easily the best hair of the 2012 candidates—even though Romney gets all the press—and like Newt himself, the coif has shown remarkable evolution over the years. From its origins in ’60s flair, Newt’s hair has shown the influence of some of the most controversial grooming trends of our time, always evolving but retaining its essential Newtness.
So in the interest of helping Florida voters with their upcoming decision, we’d like to take a look at Speaker Gingrich’s hair through the years, beginning with a young man who bears a striking resemblance to Jermaine from Flight of the Conchords...
We can say with relative certainty that four men had a rougher weekend than you: Billy Cundiff and Kyle Williams single-handedly lost NFL divisional playoff games for their respective teams, Mitt Romney coughed up a double-digit lead to lose in South Carolina (and, retroactively, in Iowa), and Italy’s least favorite cruise captain Francesco Schettino was charged with yet another count of manslaughter as the 14th passenger’s body was discovered off the coast of Giglio.
We witnessed a breakthrough in touchdown celebrations, a borough sprang to the defense of the brave scientist who discovered the G spot, and, in New York, thousands of drunken Santas descended on Grand Central Station for a crazed dance party. Here's what you may have missed...