And since there are a multitude of different follicular shapes your burgeoning lip tickler might develop into—as well as ones you might be tempted to mold it into—we’ve put together this handy guide on the appropriateness of your soup strainer of choice.
Last weekend, we were lucky enough to catch an advance screening of Wes Anderson’s latest opus, The Grand Budapest Hotel, due to hit theaters next Friday.
Stylistically, it was awesome—which came as no surprise, given the director’s personal track record of impeccable style. But there was one distinctly Andersonian quirk that stood out most this go-round: the facial hair. Period-accurate to a tee, the film is littered with triumphant upper-lip ticklers that would put most Brooklynites’ to shame, including a particularly impressive Chester A. Arthur–like situation on one Mr. Bill Murray. But you don’t have to take our word for it, because we’ve rounded up some stills for you ahead of the release.
We’ve seen a sharp rise in the semiserious celebration of the mustache—from finger tattoos, to the charitable monthlong growing contest known as Movember—and all this time we thought it was a relatively new phenomenon...
Until we stumbled upon this cache of photos from the inaugural meeting of the “Handlebar Club” at London’s Windmill Theatre. In 1947. That’s right, a slapstick crew of mustachioed men began a club dedicated to mustaches (beards strictly disallowed) nearly 70 years ago. They even went so far as to print mustaches on their silk ties (somebody write that idea down). Not to mention, it’s a surprisingly handsome lot of hirsute upper lips—which we’ll assume took longer than a month to grow.
We’ve always believed that every American has the right to let their facial hair flourish. But despite our follicular freedoms as Americans, Disney has used its muscle as an employer to keep the Magic Kingdom an entirely beard-free zone... at least, until now.
It sounds like good news, but we don’t quite see it that way. Sure, it’ll be great to see a few ’staches wandering the grounds of Epcot, and it definitely counts as a win for beard respectability worldwide—but as long as the Disney brass continues to play Steinbrenner, we’re going to have a problem with it. There’s nothing sadder than being a man forced to shave his sideburns by a shift supervisor—especially if the supervisor in question is dressed as Mickey.
John Huntsman dropped out of the race for the White House yesterday after a poll indicated he would likely receive fewer votes than Yosemite Sam. Pundits were quick to pontificate on Hunstman, but everyone seems to have missed the real story coming out of South Carolina…
We don’t like breaking the hearts of our readers, but TMZ is reporting that Hulk Hogan is shaving his trademark mustache.
The iconic blond handlebar has lorded over Hogan’s face like a peroxided Arc de Triomphe during his 12 runs as a world heavyweight wrestling champion (and oddly, as owner of the most popular 900 number from 1991-93). But as much as it hurts, we’re going to give this news a tentative endorsement.
We hesitate to spend too much time parroting in and around Margaritaville these days, but we’ll say this for Jimmy Buffett: he knew his mustaches.
We’re thinking of Mr. Buffett’s 1974 “Pencil Thin Mustache,” in which the narrator looks back nostalgically on the suave, caddish heroes he aspired to be as a child. We’ve been fans of the tune for a long time, and yet have always seemed to struggle, like Passat drivers do with “Rocket Man,” to understand some of the references. Buffett assures us this is typical of our generation. “The thing about writing a song like this is that the older you get, the more people there are who need an explanation of the characters in the song.”