Lion’s Share: Lionel Messi showed up to collect his (fourth!) Ballon d’Or in a polka-dotted tuxedo jacket and matching bow tie. Esquire thinks he might have pushed it too far.

Ansari the Question: In an unprecedented move, Aziz Ansari interviews himself for Bullett.

Pocket Full of Sunshine: Slate learns the tricks of the trade from a master pickpocket. Use this information only for good.

Not So Brief Encounter: Valet extols the virtues of investing in quality undergarments. We’ll second that emotion.

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