Now that ski season is in full swing, it’s imperative that you properly equip your chalet (or, at the very least, the place you’ll live this winter) to make sure you’re getting the most out of your wintry escapades. The ideal winter den requires a strong balance of ruggedness, alpinism and—above all else—coziness.
But for those of you inclined to go for the haymaker, we’d like to present the holy grail of competitive gift-giving—something we here at Kempt HQ like to call “Going Long.” (Trademark pending.)
Think of Going Long as the ultimate showcase of confidence and thoughtfulness—an Oprah Winfrey-an approach to appeasing the masses. You find one tremendously bold, unquestionably useful yet wholly unexpected piece of property, and you buy one for everyone. That’s it. No gift diversity here.
Done right, your generous persona goes viral, ensuring you invitations, favors and godchildren for years to come. Possibly even a LinkedIn referral. Done wrong, and... well, let’s just say your refrigerator door might be a bit bare next winter.
Gifts are hard—especially when the acquaintance involved is too young to appreciate a bottle of bourbon—so we were pleased to see these aggressively plaid teddy bears come down the transom. They come from Head Porter, where they’re surely savvy enough to remember when Comme des Garçons was splashing the same tartan on everything in sight. The result is one of the hipper toys you can give—assuming the parents are in on the joke.
When you’re at your own gallery show, you owe it to the world to get a little bit outlandish. For instance, it’s just about the only circumstances under which we’d accept a leather hat.
The gentleman in question is Allen Grubesic (that’s him in the beard), at his first solo exhibition in New York on Friday. Fortunately, he celebrated the occasion with some trim-cut pastel khakis, an invisi-tie and a gnomic beard—which is more or less the way we want our conceptual artists to look.
The suspenders are impressive enough, but we’d direct your attention to the gentleman’s pant cuffs. A preppier man would have cuffed them, maybe even showing a little sock, but Grubesic doesn’t bother. Consider this an early warning: the era of the summer roll may be drawing to a close.