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Congratulations, Rufus Wainwright—this is without a doubt the most hideous fucking outfit we’ve seen all year! We were pretty sure gossip goblin Perez Hilton was gonna waddle away with the prize, but you just left him in a pile of piggy stardust thanks to the getup you sported at the 15th Annual Watermill Summer Benefit in the Hamptons the other night.

Let’s recap: Starting with a suit that is a capital offense in and of itself—highly flammable fabric with an electroshock pattern in various shades of puke green, and some kind of metallic facing on the stingy peak lapels—you proceeded to make it even more horrible by wearing it *sans* shirt, opting instead for an assortment of Christmas tree tinsel strung around your neck, a shapeless, ill-fitting straw hat and a ratty pair of Tevas

That poor girl next to you looks like she’s mortally afraid of catching whatever it was that made you go out in public that way. So we’re officially putting you on notice, pal: you’re taking the whole ‘quirky entertainer’ thing *way* too far.

—J.P.S.

CONTRIBUTORS

  • Jared Paul Stern

CREDITS

Photography by our fearless lensman, Patrick McMullan