Thumbing through snapshots of Fashion Week, you might get the idea that it was nothing but good ideas and great clothing, just aching to leap off the runway—but it’s not so.

For every mouthwatering-but-wearable suit, there are two more that you’d never dream of putting on your shoulders, that made it to the runway only out of artistic bombast and the enduring provocateur spirit.

It’s not a bad thing (it certainly makes things more interesting for writers), but we thought we’d take a moment to look past the gushing prose and see how five of the most outlandish outfits look in the harsh light of commerce. We’ve even picked out the rare situation when you could wear them, if you’re feeling brave and wealthy…

 
The Collection: Marlon Gobel

The Buzz: “Inspired by such well-heeled n’er-do-wells such as Thomas Crown, the Kray twins and Bonnie & Clyde…” —LA Times

The Actual Inspiration: Real Steel, Gattaca, the XFL.

Where to Wear It: Your next semiformal laser tag scrimmage.

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The Collection: Robert Geller

The Buzz: “[An] urbane take on trad UK style.” —T Magazine

The Actual Inspiration: The Man with No Name meets Michael Jackson.

Where to Wear It: Your next hunting trip with Karl Lagerfeld.

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The Collection: Alexandre Plokhov

The Buzz: “Futuristic silhouettes with a dash of traditional English gentleman tossed in.” —GQ

The Actual Inspiration: A sad housekeeper.

Where to Wear It: As a male flight attendant on the first commercial flight to outer space.

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The Collection: Public School

The Buzz: “The pastoral overtones aren’t thunderous, but they do hang heavy.” —Selectism

The Actual Inspiration: Hipster rabbi.

Where to Wear It: One way or another, you’ll be welcome in Williamsburg.

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The Collection: Blanc de Chine

The Buzz: “[The] collection embraces eight elements—simplicity, serenity, purity, sensuality, harmony, subtlety, comfort and functionality.” —Jing Daily

The Actual Inspiration: Neo, Don Draper, then Neo again.

Where to Wear It: So you’re making a kung fu movie about vampires…

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
—R.B.

CONTRIBUTORS

  • Russell Brandom