Shorts

That’s a tough one.

Mostly because it’s hard to fathom a situation where you’d want to both wear shorts and don a jacket—not to mention that, well, a man wearing shorts cannot be taken seriously.

But that doesn’t mean there aren’t a few (very specific) instances when a modern man might find it appropriate to go business from the knee up, party from the calf down.

So, herewith, the eight questions you must ask yourself before walking out the door, suited from merely nape to knee.

 
—Are you currently enrolled at Eton, or a prep school with a similarly twee dress code?

—Are you conducting business while in Bermuda?

—Do you work somewhere that forbids pants—and it’s the only form of gainful employment in your town?

—Have your pant legs been caught in a bear trap (or other low-lying mechanism), forcing you to choose between life and cutting yourself free at the knee?

—Are you a suit salesman at a shop that doesn’t stock full-length trousers?

—Are you being held at gunpoint by a misguided soul hell-bent on changing the world, one shorts suit at a time?

—Does your name start with an “N” and end with an “ickelson Wooster”?

—Have you ever been, or are you currently, the lead guitarist of AC/DC?

If you answered yes to any or all of the above questions, please proceed… with caution.

—N.B.

CONTRIBUTORS

  • Najib Benouar