Last week, Cornell physicists introduced the world to something called the time cloak—a series of lasers and lenses that bends time to make things invisible.

For scientists and supervillains alike, it’s a pretty big deal—but while the scientific world is caught up in a frenzy of discovery, we thought it was our duty as responsible bloggers to point out the dangers of this powerful new technology.

In that vein, we offer a few loosely researched cautionary tales…

Scenario #1: Further Research in Personal Invisibility
A few years pass by before the first practical advancements in this field— invisibility cufflinks— see the light of day. Unfortunately, the effects prove irreversible. Doomed to a life of invisibility, test subjects turn to housecoats and eccentric sunglasses.

Scenario #2: Accidental Time Travel
When he hurls a chair at the latest version of the time cloak apparatus, a disgruntled physicist causes a wormhole that transports one plucky youth to the year 1955. After confirming the long-held “Doc Brown” theory of time travel, the young man settles into his new life in Hill Valley, where he makes fascinating discoveries in the field of rock guitar.

Scenario #3: Vehicular Anti-Visibility Measures
If the CIA doesn’t have an invisible car by 2016, we’ll be very disappointed.

—G.R.

CONTRIBUTORS

  • Geoff Rynex