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You’re Finished in This Town


In a business that judges impoliteness pretty harshly, we’re kind of amazed Vincent Gallo hasn’t been run out of town yet. But we’re glad because it means that from time to time, we get to hear batshit rants like this.

Over the course of 39 minutes, Mr. Gallo manages to mortally insult Steven Soderbergh, Martin Scorcese, Wes Anderson, Abel Ferrera, Spike Jonze, Sofia Coppola, Francis Ford Coppola, Eric Roberts, Dennis Hopper, Honda, and the Directors Guild of America. To be honest, it’s pretty rough going—and decidedly ungentlemanly throughout—but it should be a cautionary tale of what an out-of-control ego can make you sound like.

A word to the wise: If you find yourself trash-talking the director of The Godfather—who, coincidentally, gave you your most recent starring role—you may want to reconsider yourself as a human being.

On the plus side, he has nothing but nice things to say about Mickey Rourke.

Take a Swing


Golf hasn’t produced much in the way of style innovations, but it may be catching up.

The first sign: this Saturday, a fledgling pro named Ricky Barnes caused a minor stir by doffing a white painter’s cap in place of the usual full brim. It wasn’t a huge shift, but in the stylistically shuttered world of golf, it was practically a paradigm shift. Of course, a few wags in the crowd took offense—presumably they’ve only ever seen one on the help—but we applaud it. If the up-and-comers aren’t willing to go out on a limb once in a while, golfers will be stuck in sheer polos forever.

The cap itself was a prototype from his sponsor, Wilson Staff, but they aren’t putting it on sale just yet. In the meantime, we might suggest doffing this more adventurous version...just wait until you’re safely on the course.

State Secrets


Everyone’s got a few photos kicking around that they’d prefer didn’t see the light of day. But apparently Carla Bruni has more than most. And they may have fallen into the wrong hands…

One of the French first lady's exes, Raphael Enthoven, was holding onto a few “highly intimate” mementos of their time together, but last night a group of highly motivated thieves broke into the apartment where the photos were being kept and made away with the priceless stills. It’s troubling news for anyone with an interest in state sovereignty and the sanctity of nude photography.

If the secret service can’t keep a few photos out of the limelight, what hope is there for the rest of us?

You Can’t Be Serious


We usually don’t involve ourselves in the art world’s various schemes and dealings, but when it happens to involve one of our favorite tennis greats, we’ll make an exception.

Apparently Mr. MacEnroe’s latest feat is bringing down an $88 million scheme run by an art dealer named Lawrence Salander. Salander was selling multiple shares of the same painting (think The Producers), but MacEnroe was the first to notice something fishy and call out Salander on the overall sketchiness.

Given that his other clients included Robert DeNiro, it’s no small thing that McEnroe was the first one willing to blow the whistle. Just a reminder: sometimes a fiery temperament can come in handy.



Angry outbursts never look good, but we’re going to have to call this one as fair play. Or at least not obviously foul.

A true gentleman would have exercised a little more politeness, but frustration is just a byproduct of passion, and passion is always a good thing. Hundreds of actors would have let a few slips from the crew slide, and in the process accepted less from the movie and less from themselves. Much as the gossip press wishes it were otherwise, there’s no shame in caring about what you do.

Even if it means getting a little unkempt.

Clearing the Mind


Doping has been a known staple of Soviet sports since the famous Drago-Balboa fight, but lately even chess has come under suspicion.

Der Spiegel (via Neatorama) is seizing on Grandmaster Vassily Ivanchuk’s refusal to take a drug test at the recent Chess Olympiad as reason to suspect the chess world of being driven by something more sinister than just caffeine and neurosis. They even have a picture of him suspiciously fingering his nose!

Why we aren’t worried»

Thread of Truth


Political corruption is such a tradition in Chicago, it has developed its own dress code. Sixty years ago, it was the pinstripe, and while the mobster suit has gotten more subtle, it hasn’t gone away.

In light of the recent difficulties, we thought we’d point out where the trouble started. Look closely at Rod Blagojevich’s choice in fabrics: Would you trust a senate seat to a man with those checks?

We rest our case.

Oh, Lydia


Erstwhile Kemptress Lydia Hearst has apparently run into a spot of bother over her Page Six column, *The Hearst Chronicles*. Specifically, whether or not she really earned that byline

It started with a tiff over *The Hearst Chronicles*’ dissing of Hearst Media’s recession-inspired cancellation of their Christmas party. Apparently that was one tidbit Ms. Hearst wished she could un-ghostwrite, so she turned on her Page Six masters, who in turn revealed the whole façade.

The news may not shock anyone else, but we’re devastated. Lydia, we fell in love with your words! Was it all a lie?

The Line for El Baño


The exclusivity arms race in New York nightlife has been getting a little ridiculous lately, so when we saw this, we knew it was either the beginning of the end times or an exceptionally clever PR hoax. Having pondered it, we’re ready to say it’s the latter.

(Fair Warning: we’re about to get very local.)

El Baño has made waves masquerading as an exclusive New York club, but they’ve been very cagy about their location even as they’ve publicized their existence. We’ve seen people pull off the secret club before, and this isn’t how it’s done. They don’t list opening dates, they don’t post menus, and they certainly don’t have drink lists as thin as the one El Baño is sporting. The shelf life of this sort of stunt isn’t going to last more than a few weeks, so we imagine they’re going for something a little more immediate. And if you think their opening date during fashion week is a coincidence, we’ve got a bridge to sell you.

We reveal the horrible truth»

Stop Snitching


You might not know it from their ad budget, but Nike’s had brand problems for a while now. They make the right moves with the indie crowd, but they can still come off a little…evil. And their latest Chinese forays may not help. A rule of thumb: When you start calling for the heads of your critics, you may want to reconsider your PR strategy.

Gawker reports on a rumor that Nike had hurdler Liu Xiang fake an injury and drop out of the Olympic Games because of his poor chances. It’s not the most damaging rumor Nike’s faced—after all, the haters are always with us—but (as Gawker points out) they've come under fire for tampering before. And as bad as the scandal is, Nike’s response has been even worse. They reached out to their friends in the Chinese government to “investigate those that started the rumor,” meaning some poor blogger is about to get reeducated. A mess of back-pedaling followed, which ended up making everyone involved look worse.

It's familiar business to anyone who's seen *Rollerball*»

The Great Rock And Roll Swindle

seditionaries_crop.jpgImage via Selectism

It turns out even the great MOTH Malcom McLaren isn’t immune to a little swindle now and then. His historic punk clothing line—originally titled *SEX*, but eventually known as *Seditionaries*—has run into a nasty counterfeiting trade run by Simon Easton. Of course, the 30-year-old threads are collector’s items by now, so the price tags get pretty high. WWD reports that Easton has sold 80,000 UKP worth of fake merch to collectors, including artist Damien Hirst.

McLaren comments in the article, “I would never have thought 30 years ago when I was making this stuff on my kitchen table that someone would want to copy it like a Goya or a Van Gogh.” Of course, knowing McLaren, the thought has probably crossed his mind dozens of times, but it's a little too flattering. The clothes are more like history than fashion or art. The reason collectors and museums are clamoring for them—and creating a market for counterfeits—is because of McLaren’s own swindle. His SEX shop in 1977’s London was the first time anyone had thought of charging top dollar for ripped, stained clothing.

He did it all with a knowing smirk, but it didn’t stop him from getting rich. Surely he wouldn’t begrudge a fellow con man a swindle of his own?

Wake Up, Mr. West


The trajectory of Kanye West’s Blog has been strikingly similar to Kanye’s own trajectory. At first, it was written off as gimmicky and well-connected. But, through frighteningly earnest enthusiasm, it’s gradually worked its way into our heart.

Which is why this morning’s scandal comes as such a shock.

No one knows better than us, it’s hard out there for a blogger, and more than a few have speculated that it must be hard for Kanye to tour, blog, make music, and star in vodka commercials without something giving way. A ghost blogger, perhaps»