world of men's style / fashion / grooming

An UrbanDaddy Publication

Finally, Your Swiss Army Knife Is Also an Animal

Sometimes, form just needs to chill out and let function do its thing.

Third-year design student David Suhami disagrees, judging from his latest masterpiece, the Animal Pocket Knife, which “combines the idea of a Swiss Army knife and a jungle safari in Africa. The prototype is made from stainless steel to represent the current technology, while the handles are made from fine tabebuia wood to symbolize the traditional craft.”

We’re just going to call bullshit on this whole thing and be on our way.

The Worst Accessory to Sandals Since Socks

What happens when you combine hallucinogenic drugs and venture capital money? KUSA Fake Grass Flip-Flops by Yashin™ happens.

From time to time, we come across a bad idea so bad that it verges on being dangerous. And since we’re committed to limiting your style liability at all costs, we felt it our duty to walk you through the matted, slimy and downright ridiculous claims being made by the Australian ravers-turned-footwear-experts at KUSA by Yashin™.

KUSA Claim: It’s the sensation of walking barefoot on grass. Anywhere! Anytime!»

Enough Is Enough with Latte Art

We love John Lennon, we just don’t want to sip him first thing in the morning. Same goes with kittens, music, bears, bunny rabbits, words of wisdom, smiley faces, smiley faces in hearts, and Barack Obama.

That’s not to say we don’t respect the artistic side of food and beverage—it’s all in the presentation, after all. But we’re of the opinion that coffee, more than any other menu item, should fall under the function-over-form umbrella.

Incidentally, Burger King is with us on this one.

Sherlock Holmes Would Like His Laptop Back

Here’s the latest steampunk laptop from “Prestidigital Datamancery & Paraphernalia Technofetishism” expert Richard Nagy. The New York Times describes steampunk as “a subculture that is the aesthetic expression of a time-traveling fantasy world, inspired by the extravagantly inventive age of dirigibles and steam locomotives, brass diving bells and jar-shaped protosubmarines.” We describe steampunk as Comic-Con’s magniloquent Great-Aunt Gretchen serving high tea with one hand while slaying the Dungeon Master with the other.

This particular piece features a full-wood chassis with a gold foil map, physically engraved and lacquered brass keys, semiprecious gems that act as LED indicator lights and an Asus/Intel processor that might just be able to transport you and your DeLorean back to a time when normal people gave a shit about any of the words in this paragraph.

Stick with the MacBook.

Hey Homer, We Can See Your Dip

We’ve identified two* possible reasons why Cincinnati Reds starting pitcher Homer Bailey was dipping (chewing tobacco) throughout last night’s nationally televised broadcast of Sunday Night Baseball:

1. His high school bros back in La Grange, Texas, were watching and he wanted them to think he was cool. 2.

*It turns out we’ve identified only one reason why Cincinnati Reds starting pitcher Homer Bailey was dipping (chewing tobacco) throughout last night’s nationally televised broadcast of Sunday Night Baseball.

The Lamborghini Smartphone

You know what they say about guys with small hands: they buy Lamborghini smartphones. The phone part of the newly released Lamborghini TL700 is a bit of a yawner, with middle-of-the-road specs via Android and Qualcomm. The rest is a bit of a gagger, with gold casings and a back plate made from crocodile skin. To our comrades in Russia (where the phone will go on sale this summer): spend the $2,750 domesticating this golden crocodile instead of overcompensating for the one in your pants.

The Monstrosity of Yoox

If you’re into horrifying asymmetrical tuxedos, then we have a deal for you.

Sales are always dicey—especially when the site is a Euro clearinghouse like Yoox—but we’re still a little shocked when a jacket like this catches the eye of a buyer and ends up on a site. (We’re slightly less surprised that it is now on sale.)

Was there some sort of horrible tuxedo malfunction? Is it a normal jacket with the worst styling on earth? Is it a comment on formalwear anxiety? Was there a car crash? Even at a 65% discount, doesn’t $275 seem maybe a little high?

There is also the distinct possibility that Tilda Swinton will wear it to the Oscars. Stay tuned.

The Terrifying Steve Jobs Action Figure

Apple fanatics have produced some pretty weird stuff over the years (exhibit A), but we just stumbled across the most unsettling creation to date: the Steve Jobs action figure.

It’s basically all the troubling elements of the Apple fanatic in one object, right down to the “One More Thing” backdrop, just in case you want to stage your own keynote speech for the iCar. It also comes with a pair of apples (one with a bit missing), for reasons we can’t begin to fathom—and even more troubling, it looks like it’s sold out.

This Cease & Desist letter cannot arrive fast enough.

The Second Greatest Endorsement Photo We Have Ever Seen

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the second greatest endorsement photo we have ever seen. (#1 is still here.)

It comes from the new campaign for Paco Rabanne’s Black XS, which enlisted Jonas Åkerlund and an unusually somber Iggy Pop. We don’t know much about the scent itself (the samples haven’t come in yet), but Iggy’s expression speaks for itself.

We’ve never seen a man wearing gold sparklepants look so unhappy.