Here’s the latest steampunk laptop from “Prestidigital Datamancery & Paraphernalia Technofetishism” expert Richard Nagy. The New York Times describes steampunk as “a subculture that is the aesthetic expression of a time-traveling fantasy world, inspired by the extravagantly inventive age of dirigibles and steam locomotives, brass diving bells and jar-shaped protosubmarines.” We describe steampunk as Comic-Con’s magniloquent Great-Aunt Gretchen serving high tea with one hand while slaying the Dungeon Master with the other.

This particular piece features a full-wood chassis with a gold foil map, physically engraved and lacquered brass keys, semiprecious gems that act as LED indicator lights and an Asus/Intel processor that might just be able to transport you and your DeLorean back to a time when normal people gave a shit about any of the words in this paragraph.

Stick with the MacBook.

—C.B.S.

CONTRIBUTORS

  • C. Brian Smith