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This Could Be the Most Elaborate Re-Gifting of All Time...

  • Najib Benouar

We’ve been agonizing over this photo ever since it popped up on the interwebs a couple days ago. It’s equal parts mesmerizing and perplexing. Just take a moment to drink it all in... So, this much we know: Babe Ruth is receiving a French poodle from a wounded veteran. This much we don’t know: everything else. And since we can’t travel back in time to ask any of the fellows in this picture “What the hell is going on here?” we’re going to have to settle for some wild speculation.

Let’s begin our curious dissection of this scene in order of absurdity.

1. Why is the poodle going to Ruth? In this scenario, isn’t the guy who risked life and limb for his country more deserving of a warm, furry token of appreciation? Wait, is this guy trying to ditch a pooch he just received from a family member trying to cheer him up?

2. Why does this injured guy look so at-ease—to the point of nonchalantly crossing his legs? Maybe he’s just that genteel?

3. Why hasn’t anyone told this Lurch-esque fellow that his bowler hat makes him look even creepier? (Too bad, he’s pulling off that double-breasted quite well.)

4. Why does the other stretcher-bearer look ready to drop this guy the second the photo has been taken, without remorse?

5. Where is this? If it’s at Yankee Stadium or any landmark, why not pose in front of an identifiable feature instead of a blank wall?

So many questions left unanswered...