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Kempt’s Super Bowl Party Menu

The Super Bowl party is a marquee culinary event.

The menu requires a bold imagination and a month of preparation. Sure, you could go with chips, salsa and chicken wings. And, you know, hummus. Again. Or you could make a statement and serve up something as big and powerful as America.

Enter the 3-foot-tall, 319-pound, 540,00-calorie Absolutely Ridiculous Burger, now available for mail order from Mallie’s Sports Bar in Southgate, Michigan. You’ll need a forklift and $2,000 plus shipping, but, as owner/chef Steve Mallie points out, it’ll be more than enough food. “If you figure the average hamburger is a half-pound, going by that ratio you could serve, you know, 700 people.”

Go ahead and cut this one in half.