Nation of Scrappers
It looks like the grand tradition of the schoolyard brawl is slipping away. A recent survey by The Economist ranked the U.S. 17 out of 18 in terms of the battle-readiness pre-teens. French-speaking Belgians are the roughest kids on the block, with almost half of eleven-year-olds in at least three fights over the past year, with the Czechs only slightly behind. The U.S. comes in at 14%, second only to the famously peace-loving Germans.
This just confirms what talk radio hosts have been saying for years: kids these days are soft! Isn’t there some sort of national anti-effeteness program we can institute?
We also noticed that Spanish women are particularly violent, a potentially invaluable nugget of information.
- — Russell Brandom